Waking Up
Reclaiming Your Life From the Inside Out
There was a time in my life when I didn’t realize how disconnected I had become from myself. Looking back, the best way I can describe it is that I was sleepwalking. Not just professionally, but personally as well.
I was in a marriage that was disconnected, a career that felt stagnant, and looking back, I can see that my boundaries weren’t as strong as they needed to be, with myself and others. I was moving through my days, fulfilling roles, meeting expectations, and doing what I thought I was supposed to do. From the outside, it looked like I had it all. But internally, something felt off, even if I couldn’t fully name it at the time. I thought how I was feeling was normal.
There was something even more important I couldn’t see yet. I didn’t understand that the sense of fulfillment and happiness I was searching for wasn’t something another person or situation could give me.
And the truth is, you don’t recognize that pattern until you do. There’s no blame in that. There’s just awareness that comes with time, experience, and a willingness to look a little deeper.
Like so many of us, I was looking outward. I was seeking happiness from others. I was seeking support, accolades, connection all from outside of myself. And the truth is, when we rely on external sources for happiness, whether it is a career or a partnership, we unknowingly give our power away. When we allow people or situations to make us feel fulfilled, they can also become a source of disappointment, frustration, or even pain.
That realization didn’t come all at once. It unfolded over time. But eventually, I knew something needed to change. For a while, I stayed in that in-between space. Some people call this the messy middle. I was aware that things weren’t aligned, but not yet fully awake to what needed to happen next. It felt easier to keep moving forward as things were than to disrupt everything.
That’s what autopilot can look like. It’s not always dramatic. Sometimes it’s quiet. Subtle. A slow drifting away from yourself. Then life has a way of nudging you awake.
Slightly before my fiftieth birthday, my longtime yoga teacher, someone I deeply respected, transitioned from running physical studios to becoming a life coach after COVID reshaped her business.
I didn’t know what coaching was, or what it could do for me, but something within me knew I needed to sign up for her new program. So I did, as a birthday gift to myself. I didn’t fully realize it at the time, but that decision became a turning point.
Within a month, I found myself moving through a divorce. It was one of the most challenging periods of my life. There were moments of uncertainty, grief, and discomfort. But there was also something else happening beneath the surface. Growth.
Instead of completely unraveling, I had already started building something within myself. I was learning tools. Strengthening my mindset. Becoming more aware of my thoughts and patterns.
I wasn’t just reacting anymore. I was beginning to respond with intention. That shift changed everything.
Rather than staying focused on what I was losing, I slowly began to turn toward what I could create. It wasn’t immediate, and it wasn’t always easy. But it was empowering in a way I hadn’t experienced before.
Looking back, that season was both deeply challenging and incredibly expansive. And even after all of that growth, there was still a part of me that hesitated. I sat in indecision again. This time about stepping into coaching.
It felt vulnerable to put myself out there in that way. To claim that I could support others when I was still very much on my own journey. But the truth kept coming back to me. What I have learned… what I had lived… the tools I have gained… they weren’t meant to stay tucked away. They were meant to be shared.
So I made a decision. Not because I had everything perfectly figured out, but because I understood what it feels like to be stuck, and I knew that no one should have to stay there.
Today, I work with clients, especially women in midlife, who are ready for something more. Women who are tired of just getting through their days. Women who sense that there’s another way to live, even if they can’t fully see it yet.
Together, we explore what’s been running in the background. The beliefs, the habits, the patterns, and once we become aware, we begin to shift them. We create space for clarity, for intention, and for possibility.
Because the life you want isn’t as far away as it sometimes feels. And the power to create it isn’t outside of you.
Before moving on, give yourself a moment to pause and take in what’s coming up for you. This kind of awareness has a way of revealing what’s been quietly shaping your thoughts, your choices, and your experiences. When you slow down enough to notice, you create space for something new to emerge. Let the questions below guide you inward, without pressure. Take this as an opportunity to be honest with yourself about where you are and what you’re ready for next.
Before moving on, take a breath and notice what’s coming up for you. When you give yourself the space to reflect, what’s been beneath the surface can begin to come into focus. You don’t need perfect answers here, just a willingness to be honest with yourself. Let the questions below guide you inward and see what begins to unfold.
Reflective Questions
As you read this, notice what resonates:
Where in your life have you been “sleepwalking,” moving through without full awareness or alignment?
What patterns or relationships have shaped your sense of happiness, and are they still serving you?
If you allowed yourself to imagine a life built from the inside out, what would feel different?
What might change if you believed that what you desire is actually within your reach?
What is one step—however small—that would bring you closer to that version of your life?
